I've been watching a few Youtube videos on vocation and dating and such made by LifeTeen:
Vocation confusion
Sisters: in their own words
Are you ready to date?
They're really, really good! The "Are you ready to date?" one was kind of interesting, because I think it applies a lot to what I mentioned in my last post, of discerning things... And of course, the woman was talking about dating, but I think it can apply to just about any situation. She says that a person is ready to date when they feel peace in both their person (feeling comfortable with who they are) and in their prayer life (being able to enter into prayer more fully).
Very good words of advice, because before, I kind of considered that decisions required knowledge, of knowing that something is correct or the "right" path. I suppose that's right in some way... But I never got to the root of it, that that knowing comes from having peace with God and trusting in his powers to show me what He wants to lead me to. It's not necessarily just a "happy" feeling inside (which, sadly, the devil can manipulate), but it's a closeness with God and his will.
My job situation lately has been only one such situation... I applied with my mom's company earlier this month, and they basically told me that they had to go through the formalities of the application and the interviews and such because they had to legally to offer someone a job. That I basically had it in the bag. After the in-person interview, they realized that I go back to school a lot earlier than most college students from around where I live, and after a couple messy discussions between managers, they decided not to offer me the job.
That crushed my pride, because, for one, it almost seemed like they were coming up with excuses not to hire me. I thought the interviews went well, but that's only my perspective. My mom kept telling me that it's not me, that it's their politics and inner workings, but I kept beating myself up, basically.
Until I realized that maybe that was meant to happen. That I placed my hope too fully on this one opportunity and that I needed a healthy dose of humility. Before I went into the interview, I prayed for God's will. And this must have been it. I'm not supposed to work there, and it should give me comfort to know that God found a way for me to not get the position. It still hurts, but with a ton more applications to fill out and checking up, I really hope I can get something. If it is His will.
"In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight."
-Proverbs 3:6
As for my vocation, I've been really attracted to the vocation of marriage lately, but once again, I just have to keep asking God to show me... in his time, what is best.
"But remember the Lord your God, for it is he who gives you the ability to produce wealth, and so confirms his covenant, which he swore to your forefathers, as it is today."
-Deuteronomy 8:18
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